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[04/17/08] |
I'm perfectly content with the belief that theres nowhere to go when I die.
Even though I was taught otherwise all of my life.
This is why we seek RELIGION BahAHhAHHAhHAHHHAaa
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[04/15/08] |
I think Ive developed a profound contempt and loathing toward drugs and even alcohol
Especially when either or both are mixed with stupidity
or are used as excuses for misconduct and rash decisions
although it makes me chuckle a little
I just don't understand why people can't find simpler means to enjoy life experiences
Most people believe they are perfectly justified in doing so
Idk it just disgusts me sometimes
I'm not trying to change anyones habits or opinions just sharing mine
I love that Stetson has a dorm completely devoted to promoting healthy living =]
Most people tell me its all going to change once I go to college
why do I have to conform to the college stereotype?
or any for that matter?
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[04/14/08] |
Stolen from Vero
It made me smile
"He awoke her sleeping heart
And swept away the darkness
An acute fear of flying
Couldn't keep her away"
=]
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| dih dik |
[04/11/08] |
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thees no dik like dih dik
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| SENIOR DAY |
[04/10/08] |
Last home game of the season
I made a triple play! (TRUE STORY, it's on video)
and I hit a triple and a double (2 for 3)
and made other incredible plays
probably one of the best games I've ever played
we lost but I wasnt disappointed
we held them for a good while
video coming soon =] haha
Also, the posters, flowers and gifts were adorable thanks to my girlies
Now on to districts. We'll see how far we get this year.
I guess I'll still play this summer too.
My weekend is fucking booked to the max.
Friday after school I have practice then I'm off to sushi with Le Favreau, Jazzy Fizzle, Anjello, Vero, Jade and myself
Then off to sunrise to chill
Saturday I have practice at 10-12
Then picking up Rebecca from Coral Springs and we're going to the beach
Theeeeeeeeen going to the show at churchills HOPEFULLY with my baby Steph and whoever else
and Sunday going to get tatted up with Frank
FINALLY
DONT CALL ME I'M BUSY lol
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[04/09/08] |
I've also established that first love is hard because you don't know anything else.
And it probably won't be the only love interest of my life.
There's no need to dwell on it because I'm a vivacious young lady with plenty to offer a well deserving young man.
Emphasis on well deserving.
So it's time to stop sulking and patiently await the arrival of my next encounter with Cupid's arrow.
But it's not my primary priority.
I love my friends so dearly.
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[04/09/08] |
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ugh, who knows if this method will even work.
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[04/07/08] |
I think the worst of it is that you spoiled me and I just became accustomed to the continual routine and affection
but I'm trying to defer my thoughts from the positive and dwell on the negative
because thats why we're not together in the first place
However I'm afraid that might make me hate you
and most think I should and it would be easier
but I can't and I don't want to
and I'm not looking to date the first boy that comes along to attempt to forget
it's not logical nor is it effective
I'm doing just fine.
Life is grand.
And I mean that sincerely.
I'm content with our friendship and I know I'm not being replaced.
I just hope you truly learned something from this because I know I certainly did.
Never be too nice, some people just don't know how to handle it or embrace it.
Kind of funny.
Whoever thought a relationship would be destroyed because someone gave it their all?
College is all too far away but I'm sure it will be here before I know it
and then I can move above and beyond you
meeting the love of your life in high school < meeting the love of your life in college
Yeah, that sounds about right.
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[04/06/08] |
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I'm profoundly happy otherwise.
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[04/04/08] |
I'm really good at pretending
unless no one is around
time is all we got
but who knows what'll happen then
I want to vomit
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[03/30/08] |
I'm trying
and it's getting better
but it's kind of gotten to the point where going out with my friends isn't a big enough distraction
especially if I go to certain places or hang out with certain people
I can't wait for college and new beginnings
I just hope I get there
my grades slipped a little and I hope that doesn't affect anything
that would just be a bigger wrench in the gears of my life
but I think it should be ok
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[03/25/08] |
The only thing I can say to justify my current situation
and make me feel less pathetic is
I'm only fucking human
I never knew the meaning of the word vulnerable up until recent encounters
I thought I was immune to emotional distress
sometimes its okay not to be a tough guy
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[03/14/08] |
To think I go out there and literally sacrifice my body to come home bloody, bruised, and battered for nothing
and to possibly destroy my chances of curing my already developed and prolonged injuries and completely abolishing my chances of playing in college
all for what?
for a bunch of ungrateful little cunts that think im just a nagging bitch because they dont know what the fuck they're doing.
sometimes I think Im too selfless
and that could be my tragic flaw.
because so far it hasn't gotten me very far
I guess the cliche is true.
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[03/13/08] |
Infatuated with being in your forbidden rapture
until I must say Adieu.
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[02/24/08] |
I want to be done and free of this
you still manage to disrupt my euphoria
Im looking forward to going away to college and being secluded from everything Ive ever known
without a friend or a guardian
I want to be free to indulge myself in knowledge and art and music and people without restraints or confinement
not have to worry about my friends being judged or the way I choose to live my life being criticized
not have to satisfy your every want and need like a fucking mother
just to get shit in return
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[02/05/08] |
hope you're fucking happy
you and your petty bullshit
high school < college
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[02/03/08] |
wtf do you bitches know
be concerned with your own lives and not mine
you think lurking someones myspace gives you all the answers
grow up
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[01/24/08] |
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He makes me smile a lot.
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[01/16/08] |
The MOST:
Impulsive
Irrational
Stubborn
Critical
Judgmental
etc.
person I know
and I dated you for a year.
I don't know If I had just been ignoring it or convincing myself against it all this time.
You couldn't understand my taking on some much responsibility/overloading on responsibility because you have none to worry about yourself and have never been in my situation before. Therefore, you couldn't possibly relate or empathize but you couldn't even sympathize.
I just complained too much to you when I said I might not be able to see you because I have homework or I have to go home because my mother wants me to.
I constantly sit here and try to rationalize our relationship and your behavior in my head but I just don't understand
and it seems like you won't allow me to have closure
because you're too busy being childish to converse
you were always right and I was always wrong
the word apology isn't in your vocabulary.
it makes me sick and i hate it
but it wasn't all bad
and thats what gets me.
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